Men: The Missing Link
by Dr. Wayne F. Brauning

These are times for pro-life people to rethink and re-examine what we are doing. The pro-life community has faithfully continued to do what it has always done. Now is the time to discover where the missing links are in our effort to change the abortion culture we live in.

I suggest that the one main link that has been left out of pro-life efforts is men. Men have been left out of the pro-life movement. I can see it everywhere I go.

Margaret Mead, who was no friend at all of Christianity, nonetheless had some very interesting things to say in her book Male and Female, published in 1949. She said the central problem in any culture is "what to do with men." That's right! And she goes on to say, "the recurring problem of civilization is to define the male role satisfactorily enough. If men are ever to be at peace, ever to be certain of their lives and that they have lived them to the full as they meant to be, they must have, in addition to paternity (being a father), culturally elaborated forms of expression that are lasting and sure."

The American cultural structures have been attacking the role of men since the 1960s. The secular feminist movement pushed for abortion on demand as the central controlling and pivotal factor in their takeover of cultural concerns. Males, by abortion, have been emasculated in a way that even the slaves of this country were not. The slave working in the field could point across the field and say, "That's my boy!" But the post-abortion father has no one to point to. He has no power in the process and politics of abortion to protect his child in the womb.

Men are denied their God-given responsibility to protect and provide for their children by the abortion laws and abortion mentality of this country. Radical secular feminism made it absolutely clear that the decision to abort a child anytime during the nine months of pregnancy for any reason or no reason at all is between a woman and her doctor. Planned Parenthood of Central Missouri v. Danforth in 1976 made it impossible for fathers to take any legal action in the care of their own preborn children.

The concept of a "disposable man" is popular today. Cartoons depicting women disposing of men in trash cans are common. Many women seem to delight in such scorn. At the same time, they complain that men are not responsible.

Men, typically, are silent after an abortion. They are usually considered an accomplice or, at the very least, not man enough to prevent the death of their child. And so, the man who has just lost his child to abortion says to himself, "I won't say anything. Never mind if I'm guilty or angry or hurt. I'll just keep it to myself."

These men are in our congregations, sitting in church pews on Sunday morning. They harbor guilt and nurse pain. Oftentimes they are incapable of leadership at home or in the church. Their wives may drag them to church but they are so angry and guilty that they cannot confidently lead their families and the church.

The pro-life community has been moved by compassion for the women and their helpless preborn. Crisis pregnancy centers across the country testify to this fact. My wife and I have been ministering through Alpha Pregnancy Services in Philadelphia for over 15 years and God has blessed that work. But its ministry is almost completely to women. In a sense, we have bought into the theory that a woman is singularly important in the whole matter of whether or not a pregnancy continues. We have eliminated the father and other men from the circle of concerned persons. Many people respond, "I never really thought men were involved." Who do you think supplied the sperm?

I think the Christian church, by its own oversight and neglect, has been heretically unbiblical in its response to the abortion situation by leaving men out. Margaret Mead (remember, she's not a friend of Christianity) also wrote, "In our newfound preoccupation over the natural world, might men so forget God that they would build a barrier against the wisdom of the past that no one can penetrate?" I believe that we've done that by listening to the feminist movement rather than to the Word of God.

Genesis, which I take as literal history, records the temptation of Eve by Satan. In tempting Eve, Satan inverted God's order of authority. God gave the command not to eat of the fruit of that one tree to Adam. Adam was responsible to pass that command on to his wife and to protect her. By inverting God's order, Satan attacked woman where she was vulnerable. She was tempted to ignore the man. Adam, like a dummy, stood right there, because Genesis 3:6 says, "she gave some to her husband who was with her and he ate it." He stood right there and took the fruit. By his sin, hell was loosened on earth. Their denial came in the form of fig leaves.

As pro-lifers, we, too, have left men out. We have organized our efforts around the women and children, ignoring the male's responsibility, his guilt, and his pain.

Without apology, I want to say that the Bible is a male-oriented book. That makes a lot of people mad. But it's true. Read it! God Himself is presented to us in the male gender. All of the authors were male. The prophets were male. Jesus Christ came to earth as a man. The apostles were male. The language of the laws and exhortations of the Scripture were almost always written in such a way that was addressed to males for the care of society, the church, and family. The Bible says we must tell the men what they are to do, expect them to do it, and require them to conform. Only then will they become the strong civilized leaders of family, church, and culture.

Secular feminism has not made life better in America. Instead, it has complicated it and may soon destroy it. The direction that feminism takes us in will make life less and less tolerable because God alone knows how He has wired male and female and God alone knows how to fulfill us.

Men's Involvement

Men become involved in abortion in four different ways. First, a man might pressure the mother of the child to abort. Such men want to hide their sin if it's an illicit relationship, or save face. Perhaps it's a relationship outside of marriage. Perhaps they are "good" church members and have just "fallen in love" with a woman other than their wife. Sometimes the reasons a man pressures a woman to abort are financial.

The second way that a man enters the abortion arena is by passively supporting the woman. The man is unable or unwilling to take leadership.

The third way that a man enters the abortion arena is by opposing the woman's desire to have an abortion. Such a man is brave and courageous because he's just entered a battle that he is almost certain to lose unless he can persuade the woman to change her mind. Legally, he will always lose.

Finally, a man enters the abortion arena when he abandons the woman to let her make her own decision and thus live with the consequences.

The guilt . . . can eat away at this Christian Commitment

The reactions of men to abortion almost always fall into the following categories.

Men isolate themselves but are also isolated by other people, especially those who know about the abortion. They slide into denial, living as though it never happened. They use excuses to hide their pain -- "Hey! It's legal and there wasn't any other choice." Life doesn't go on the same way after that.

Reaction of Men

Men experience guilt. There is false guilt and true guilt. False guilt is exemplified by the young man from China whose wife was forced by the government to have an abortion because they hadn't been married long enough. He said, "I feel guilty for making a baby too soon." True guilt occurs after the father participates in the decision to kill his own child or refuses to stop the abortion. A man who is an accomplice to abortion is truly guilty of the sin of murder. Pastors, we have work to do! The guilt, anger, and rage of abortion degrade the quality of a man's life and can eat away at his significant relationships and his Christian commitment.

The Hope

I propose that we push the door open for men to come, to repent; that we offer them the forgiveness of Jesus Christ; that we call men who are under the conviction of their sin to the life-giving, transforming, forgiving, comforting, and reconciling power of Christ.

Recently, my wife and I worshipped in the Castle Church in Wittenberg, Germany, where Martin Luther nailed his ninety-five theses. I stood for a moment at the awesome pulpit where Luther preached for 22 years. If God could start a fire in that little town in 1517 which changed the world and impacted every society ever since, why can't God start a similar fire in Lutheran congregations through Lutherans For Life? This fire can transform men, women, families, and societies by calling all people to the humbling message that Martin Luther found in the Scriptures: The just shall live by faith. That's the only and real hope for our culture.

The guilt . . . can eat away at his Christian commitment.

This article is excerpted from Dr. Brauning's workshop at the 1998 National LFL Convention in Dallas, Texas. Rev. Dr. Wayne F. Brauning and his wife are the parents of three children and grandparents of nine. Dr. Brauning's D. Min. thesis, Men and Abortion, laid the foundation for Men's Abortion Recovery Ministries (MARC). Dr. Brauning has served in corrections and education as well as pastoral ministry, most recently as pastor of Immanuel Presbyterian Church (PCA) in Exton, PA. You may reach Dr. Brauning by calling (610) 384-3210.

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