December 10, 2015

At just 24 weeks and zero days pregnant, the doctor gave me news that blew me away. My son wasn’t growing in utero anymore. He was measuring sixteen days behind in size and was probably about three days away from passing away. Upon admission to the hospital, the neonatologist told me that if my son survived the birth, he would have about a 35% chance of survival.

Doctors are supposed to give you the worst case scenario and worst possible numbers. They are just that though—numbers. My God is bigger than any number. He had a different plan already in place for me and my son.

24 weeks and 6 days. Is life outside of the womb possible at this gestational age? Or is the thought inconceivable, incomprehensible?

As I walked myself into the operating room and climbed up on the operating table, the scariest thoughts went through my head. Here I am about to be a first-time mom, not knowing what the next few minutes, hours, days, months will bring. I prayed and prayed. Romans 8:26 says, “Likewise the Spirit helps us in our weakness. For we do not know what to pray for as we ought, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us with groanings too deep for words.” The next moments were crucial as doctors worked swiftly to ensure a safe delivery for my baby boy.

I didn’t hear the “typical” cry after my child was born. Instead, I heard doctors and nurses hurrying to stabilize my baby. My baby boy. My baby boy who had entered the world weighing just 14.1 ounces and measuring just 11 inches. Jacob Aiden Zahnow was born into this world via emergency C-section when I was just 24 weeks and 6 days pregnant. He was the size of a 21-week baby. At this time, I only knew one thing was certain: Jacob needed to be baptized and quickly! As doctors moved in earnest to get him to the neonatal intensive care unit, my pastor gave Jacob a new life through the waters of Holy Baptism.

Throughout Jacob’s first couple months in the neonatal intensive care unit, I witnessed miracle after miracle! The greatest miracle was watching the third trimester unfold before my eyes. Right in front of me, in an incubator, I watched development occur that would normally be happening in the womb. Seeing God’s work being done, first hand, in the development of a baby is so incredibly awe-inspiring! It is completely unfathomable to me to think that, even at this stage, some people still see a baby as simply a “fetus”—a “fetus” that can be discarded as easily as the daily trash.

When Jacob was born, his eyes were still fused shut. In utero, a baby’s eyes don’t open until around the 28th week of gestation. Around Jacob’s 27th gestational week outside the womb, I began to notice movement behind what would become his eyelids. It was at this time that the nurses began putting a lubricating ointment on Jacob’s eyes to ensure that his eyes would be moist as they opened. Just on target, around halfway through the 28th gestational week, Jacob’s eyes opened—first the left and then, a couple of days later, the right. What a wonderful sight that was!

Since Jacob was born so prematurely, he was unable to regulate his own body temperature. He was merely a skeleton with a very thin layer of skin covering his bones. His body temperature stayed regulated through the buttons on the incubator where he lived. Doors on the incubator couldn’t be open for too long because it wouldn’t take long for Jacob’s body temperature to drop! In utero, body temperature regulation occurs around the 30th gestational week.

On Jacob’s 25th day of life outside the womb, I was finally able to hold my son. I couldn’t just pick him up and cuddle him, however. Three nurses had the very daunting task of making sure every cord and wire was in place before Jacob was lifted from the incubator and onto my chest. For one whole hour, he was snuggled on my chest, literally, down the front of my shirt. We were under a heat lamp with two fleece blankets covering us. Jacob’s temperature was checked every fifteen minutes to make sure his body temperature stayed at a normal level.

Since Jacob was born so prematurely, his skin was like paper. I could see his little heart beating through his chest. I could count every rib. The most difficult part about his skin being so thin was the fact that I was unable to rub my hand on his back or arms. I couldn’t stroke his little head. Why couldn’t I? With skin as thin as his was, the nerve endings were so close to the top of the skin that it was too  stimulating for him—almost painful.

24 weeks 6 days. Is life outside of the womb possible at this gestational age? Or is the thought inconceivable, incomprehensible? You have your answer! Life is most definitely possible! Jacob is just a couple months shy of three years old! He does have some developmental issues, but it’s nothing that some therapy can’t help! Praise the Lord! Amen!

Sarah Fish is a Lutheran school teacher from Bay City, Michigan.